Thursday, February 16, 2017

The Small Wins - No not small - The WINS

Today we celebrated Founders' Day at my school, the University of the District of Columbia.  This post will not be a history of my great school.  Although I do feel my school deserves a history post and maybe one day I will do that post.  No today I am going to share a small win.  As I just typed in "small win" I feel like I shouldn't down play the enormity of how I feel. 

Today we all came to the school theater to celebrate and listen to speeches and watch performances.  As I went in excited looking forward to seeing it all, I suddenly remembered the last time I sat in this theater.  It was November 2016 for the Miss University of the District of Columbia Coronation.  It was a great event but I remember the pain.  The pain you feel when your hips spread when you sit and you don't really fit in the seat fully.  I remember looking around and wondering could anyone tell how uncomfortable I was.  I remember feel like this can't be right, maybe its something wrong with this seat.  Then I moved to another seat to have the same thing happen.  Then, finally I remember the acceptance, this is my body and this is what I have to deal with, so I will enjoy myself as much as I can. 
 
So as I selected a seat I prepared myself for the feelings to come back.  I wasn't going to let those feeling stop me.  I was still going to come with my fellow students to celebrate the school I love.  Then it happened.  I sat down AND nothing.  No pain, no squeezing in, no hand rest digging in my sides.  The feeling of being able just to sit easily.  I looking around me to see if anyone else had noticed what just happen but of course no one had.  I'm just any other person sitting down.  

On this day it was a win.  I've been working out consistently for a while now but I have yet to visually see any difference in my body but today I felt it and it was AMAZING.  I know for some people siting in a chair is nothing but not for me.  For me sitting in a chair is a mental exercise of will it fit me, will it hold me, will I brake it.  So today I almost cried for joy, even as I write this I am holding back the tears.  My goal is not to be skinny.  My goal is to be the best me possible, to be healthy, to be happy and to be comfortable in my skin. 

 So today I WON on UDC Founders' Day.  



Be Blessed and Smile

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